I feel like I’ve cheated my blog out of the last two or three weeks of my life and I don’t even know where to begin with it all. I went through Formal Recruitment for Greek Life on my campus and am now a pledge for Sigma Sigma Sigma. I don’t truly begin my pledge process until I get home from Christmas break and believe me, I’m counting down the days. Not because I’m just that excited to be treated like crap, but because in just three months, my home has transformed. Perhaps its just me (and most likely it is because everything is exactly the same as how I left it) but home no longer feels like home. I guess I’ve grown and adapted to Providence and the new people that I hang out with so much. Now that I think of it, I was never that tied down here anyway. It’s just an odd feeling to feel as though you’re back at square one even though you’ve gone through some major changes and experiences. Within these sloppily painted orange walls, I feel the same as I did all throughout high school. Shouldn’t it be different? I truly don’t know, I guess it’s all speculation. I came home wanting everything to be the same but expecting it to be different and when it was all the same, I felt disappointed. That, perhaps, is the best way to put it.

And it doesn’t even feel like Christmas. 80 degrees? Really Houston? I’d gotten used to the scarves and coats and the Christmas lights accentuated by the light touch of snow flurries and here the lights fail to shine in comparison to the overbearing sun. At any rate, my mom still fails to approve of anything that I do. My cousin and Aunt are still suffering through personal dilemmas, my friends are exactly the same and the only thing that’s changed is my spending habits. I havent saved a dime since I started school and have used the words “I’m-a-broke-college-student” far too often since I’ve been here. I bought one person in my family a gift and it wasn’t even my mother and tomorrow (Christmas Eve) I’m going to bust my ass trying to scrape up some dough to buy other gifts. 

All of this while trying to keep enough money in the bank for the Guatemala service trip that I was accepted in. 500 bucks ain’t much. Happy Holidays.